Some thoughts...on Love.

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Some thoughts...on Love.

Postby Saturn » Sat Feb 10, 2018 11:07 pm

I know there's barely anyone visits this site anymore apart from random spambots and so on so I doubt anyone will really read this but just thought I'd share some of my thoughts on this cold wintry night.


With the [dreaded] Valentine's day approaching fast my thoughts turn inevitably to matters of the heart.

If fascinates us, excites us, depresses us, makes us do the most extraordinarily reckless and sometimes desperate things in i's name. It can bring forth incredible acts of self-sacrifice and devotion, and acts of such selfishness and jealousy that are the very worst kinds of human behaviour.

I have loved, been loved, but only really, truly fallen so desperately in love that I could barely breathe once, and once only.

Perhaps I may never feel like that again; perhaps that is also a good thing.

Not that I don't want to drink deep once more of that well of infinite need and longing but that such an all-consuming, desperation and inhumation, such annihilation of self is probably not very healthy at all, and a moderate attachment and compatibility with another person is more desirable for a healthy, happy existence in this life.

Maybe the only true love is to love a stranger. Disappointment and disillusion grows of knowledge. No love is more intense than that of ignorance, perfection in ignorance, in lack of knowledge, in not knowing someone, but loving from afar, from the safety of a stranger. This love is pure, unsullied, and yet ultimately tragic and doomed to end in tears.

We spend our lives trying to learn to love ourselves, to fall in love with our whole selves, our faults and failings included and yet we [in ignorance] fall so easily in love with a whole other person.
Love is not wise.

Saying that, to love someone from afar, or from only slight acquaintance can never last, can never satisfy: it is at best a ravening wolf that stares hungrily, ravenously at it's next meal. There is no comfort, no happiness to be had in starvation.

Worse perhaps; and I have much experience of this, is the love that is nurtured by contact, by friendship; that grows organically, a slow and steady headlight that emerges from a tunnel, that dazzles one day with it's glare and leaves you blind, helpless and knocked down by your own realisation:

I LOVE this person, I NEED this person. I MUST have this person. I CANNOT be without this person. If I were to LOSE this person I would have lost all that I hope for now, for the future, I would be totally destroyed and beaten.

When that happens, if there is a mutuality of feeling, even a scintilla of willingness on both sides, love could inevitably blossom, given time, given a declaration, or an exploration of their feelings.

When it is a one-way street, when the other person has either no idea, or no wish to feel like that about the other, or would never even think of the other person in that way all that can result is either complete misery, or a complete failure and rejection of that person.

Unrequited love has been from time-immemorial a subject for poets, and artists. Anyone that has ever felt that way [and I'm pretty sure everyone has at some point in their lives to a greater or lesser extent] will know the pain, the worry, and the hurt and agony of that feeling.

Yes to have loved, and lost is indeed a tragedy, but to love in despair of an echo; to love without hope [and what is love but the supreme manifestation of all human desires] is truly the worst of both worlds and a situation that can only be pitied.

I wish you all, if you have a special someone to hold them tight whenever, and wherever you can, not just on some artificially designated day of the year but to cherish that person for all that they are, all that they mean to you, and ask always what you can do to make them happy, and in their happiness lies the foundation of yours.
Selfishness has no place in love, possession has none either - mutual acceptance, and mutual benefit are all you need and all that should matter.
Love that person, let them love you, despite yourself, BECAUSE of yourself and know that we are all just fumbling for the matches in the dark, no-one can see their way in this life better than anyone else, just keep searching with goodness in your heart.
"Oh what a misery it is to have an intellect in splints".
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