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Saturn's Girl

PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 2:08 pm
by dks
In the spirit of Saturn's moving story of his 'friend's' dash in the rain to catch a girl...this one came to me last night... :wink:


Saturn’s Girl

Watching you from the icy shanks
I see sharply from here through
The sleeted hollows.

You are mighty and arresting,
Lemon-amber, orbed,
Pivoting, weightless,
With a white hot
Trace
Of fire flow.

In the ring
I escort
The dusty spokes
And force the floes
Along the arena gorge.

I’m your shepherding
Satellite,
Far below the station
Of your many moons,
Sitting and waiting
For the thunder show.

PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2006 11:51 pm
by Saturn
Wow - that makes it sound a lot more romantic than it actually was for *my friend* :shock:

I'm honoured :D

PostPosted: Fri May 05, 2006 12:08 am
by Credo Buffa
Awww, poor Saturn, getting picked on by all these girls. :P

Beautiful, Denise. Lovely metaphor. :D

PostPosted: Fri May 05, 2006 5:12 am
by dks
Thank you... :oops: :wink:

PostPosted: Fri May 05, 2006 5:12 am
by dks
Saturn wrote:Wow - that makes it sound a lot more romantic than it actually was for *my friend* :shock:

I'm honoured :D


Good. Then I did my job.

PostPosted: Fri May 05, 2006 10:28 am
by Saturn
I have a confession to make - by the time *my friend* got there she was already gone so he never got to tell her how he really felt that day and the next day he attempted to ask her out on the very same day another guy did what he was going to do and his heart was broken. :cry:

He had to spend several more weeks working with these people - oh the torment of having to wear the mask of friendship when bitter tears and insane jealously were tearing him apart.

As only Shelly could put it...

‘Month after month,’ he cried, ‘to bear this load
And as a jade urged by the whip and goad
To drag life on, which like a heavy chain
Lengthens behind with many a link of pain! –
And not to speak my grief – O, not to dare
To give a human voice to my despair,
But live and move, and, wretched thing! smile on
As if I never went aside to groan,
And wear this mask of falsehood even to those
Who are most dear – not for my own repose
Alas! no scorn or pain or hate could be
So heavy as that falsehood is to me…”
Julian and Maddalo, 300-11.

PostPosted: Fri May 05, 2006 2:40 pm
by dks
I'm sorry you suffered that, Saturn. :(

PostPosted: Sat May 06, 2006 3:03 pm
by Saturn
No, it's fine - everyone has to suffer their first heart-break.

That was mine, three years ago and I've two more serious ones since which make that little incident seem like a walk in the park.

I never really knew her - It was more a case of the idea of loving someone, rather than the actual person herself [though she was a wonderful person and incredibly attractive also].

Enough of this - we should be complimenting Denise on her fine poem.
:roll:

PostPosted: Sat May 06, 2006 8:30 pm
by dks
Saturn wrote:No, it's fine - everyone has to suffer their first heart-break.

That was mine, three years ago and I've two more serious ones since which make that little incident seem like a walk in the park.

I never really knew her - It was more a case of the idea of loving someone, rather than the actual person herself [though she was a wonderful person and incredibly attractive also].

Enough of this - we should be complimenting Denise on her fine poem.
:roll:


*SIGH* yes, haven't we all suffered that bastardly miserable thing. Thank you for liking my poem...it's a ridiculously emotional piece for me. :oops: