Intellectual Denial

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Intellectual Denial

Postby AsphodelElysium » Sat May 19, 2007 3:43 pm

And yet another. The only distinguishing characteristic of this one is that it is indeed a sonnet. I've written several sonnets but they are generally very, very, very bad. This isn't necessarily an exception, but I hope its more fair to middling than horrendously bad.

Intellectual Denial

In the simple thoughtlessness of folly-filled youth
where the air sparkles with a fresh felicity,
tenderness bloomed in the crimson fertility
of a heart fed by false hope and imagined truths.
A stony man of intellect let passion pass;
on him a quiet voice and faint words were wasted.
He hungered after mysteries yet untasted.
Faded fast the beauty of the rose colored glass;
all dreams came to naught with unrequited wisdom.
Anger-masked grief engendered by rough, cold reason
bled glory from that pale breast, fating chilled seasons.
Ice stole quickly into that soft, aching kingdom -
There is a dark sorrow now no one knows about,
a wound deep inside where all of Heaven flows out.
"Let me not wander in a barren dream,
But, when I am consumed in the fire,
Give me new Phoenix wings to fly at my desire."
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Postby adonais » Sun May 20, 2007 7:13 am

Ooh this is nice, darkly beautiful. The last couplet is strong, but the whole thing is excellent in my opinion. I may be a little confused about the dramatis personae though; is the narrator from "Faded fast the beauty.." the man from the preceding, or another one? (you?)
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Postby AsphodelElysium » Sun May 20, 2007 7:40 am

Thank you, adonais! The narrator is, sadly, myself. But yes, also the one with the faded rose-colored glasses.
"Let me not wander in a barren dream,
But, when I am consumed in the fire,
Give me new Phoenix wings to fly at my desire."
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Postby adonais » Sun May 20, 2007 8:18 am

Ok thanks, although now that I think about it it was rather ungentlemanly of me to query a poet the meaning of her poem. I could read it in two different ways, however, that both made sense to me, and wasn't sure which one you intended. And I'd add that there's certainly nothing sad about being the narrator and author of such fine verse! :wink:
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Postby AsphodelElysium » Sun May 20, 2007 10:18 am

If that is as "ungentlemanly" as you get, then I think I can deal with it. :wink: Seriously though, I appreciate the feedback and if something was unclear, then its my job as the author to correct it. Speaking of, I should have been more specific, the situation that gave rise to the verse is sad. Thanks again, for the feedback.
"Let me not wander in a barren dream,
But, when I am consumed in the fire,
Give me new Phoenix wings to fly at my desire."
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Location: Virginia

Re: Intellectual Denial

Postby Saturn » Sun May 20, 2007 10:06 pm

AsphodelElysium wrote:Ice stole quickly into that soft, aching kingdom -
There is a dark sorrow now no one knows about,
a wound deep inside where all of Heaven flows out.


I love, love, love this :D
"Oh what a misery it is to have an intellect in splints".
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Postby AsphodelElysium » Mon May 21, 2007 2:38 am

Thank you! :D
"Let me not wander in a barren dream,
But, when I am consumed in the fire,
Give me new Phoenix wings to fly at my desire."
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AsphodelElysium
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Joined: Sat Mar 31, 2007 2:58 am
Location: Virginia


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